How Do You Love Someone You Don’t Like?

I wrote this out when I was listening to a programme on Premier Christian Radio. I made notes because I need it and I’m sure I’m not the only one who does.

I’ve heard the question more than once.

Love is an act of the will, a decision we make, a choice we make. It is not a feeling, not emotional, not expressed in kind action just because we like the person, or because we can get something back from them. But it is an act of the will to purposely choose to love the unlovely in action- by word, deed, giving, even a smile, a hug, encouragement, a compliment and not necessarily money or things. (t.b.c.)

It is not, I love you because…; or, I love you when…;  or, I love you if…; Rather it is- I love you. Full stop. Unconditional. If we want a reason it is: I love you because we are all children of God our heavenly Father, our Creator. Or, we are all members of the same one body - the body of Christ.

Jesus said, “love your enemies; bless them that curse you; do good to them that hate you; pray for them that despitrefully use you.”

Our “enemies are people who hurt us, hate us , or those we naturally feel we don’t like.

First of all we have to stop thinking and saying,” I don’t like…” We have to start saying, ” I choose to like, or love…”,  because that is God’s will, God’s Way.

“Love one another as I have  loved you.” And Jesus loved sacrificially,unconditionally and unchangeably.

Even if we don’t like the person’s actions, habits, behaviour, mannerisms etc. by an act of our will, we still choose to love them. (t.b.c.)

We have to ask the holy Spirit to help us and accept that help by faith.

Love is an action, a choice we make. We don’t have to wait for, or depend on feelings.

We must desire to walk this walk and love on purpose, consistently, as a way of life, consciously and deliberately.  We cannot give up and say, “This is how I am, I cannot help it, and don’t care if we cannot help it. We have to work at it.

We must purpose to love in action and not just in word or thought.

If we are disciples of Christ, His followers, desiring to be more Christlike, then we should walk in love as He did, and as He commands us to do.

 ”Love   one another as I have  loved you.” (t.b.c.

This is not automatic. It is a journey we have to desire to make -that is the starting point.  Then we have to follow consistently, deliberately, forgetting the “me”, “myself” and “I”, and focus on others,, concerned about their welfare more than ours. Very challenging!!

Agape love is not a feeling.  It is the God-kind of love, which is love in action. “For God so loved the world that He gave…” God expressed His love in action and so must we. As we give to and serve others we are doing this unto Jesus. ” In as much as you have done it to the least of these, you have done it unto Me.” 

To serve God is not only serving through ministry gifts, or in ministry in a natural way, because we may confine this only to fellow christians and to church.

We have to serve God by serving others anytime, anywhere, anyway. And serving is sometimes sacrificial, which calls for unselfishness on our part. And we must not give to others motivated by expectation of something in return.  God knows, God sees, and He will reward us in the form of our need.

If we want to be more like Jesus we have to be committed to this way of life, not as following a rule, but desiring this and being willing  to follow His Way as a Way of life.  The essence of Jesus’ life was the Way of Love.

As I said before- very challenging!!

Where I fail I have this as my consolation  and expectation.- ” I will open up My heart and pour My love into your heart. It will be like a wave.

My love will launch you into your destiny.”

Prophetic words in church a few years ago.